New Year New Mindset

Thankfulness

I recently had family over in my home for the first time in awhile due to the pandemic. It felt good to cook a meal for them and to safely gather. I was beyond grateful for this moment. When it was over I sat and reflected how I have taken for granted gatherings like this hundreds of times before.

This past year has been very difficult for many. During this time I confirmed something my dad told me long ago, that if you are thankful you will not be as fearful or worried. This is not to say that all will magically be perfect in your life, but by redirecting your mind and focus to things that you are thankful for does make a big difference (in mood and thoughts).

So many people are scared to speak on many topics right now. Scared they will come off as insensitive, saying something that will cost them friends or followers. I have seen people lash out at each other, unfriend each other, and be so unkind. People are visibly becoming more divided and on edge.

No mater if you side with the right or the left remember we are all humans. Turn your focus from the likes, follows and trying to be of popular opinion and take time to be kind to your fellow man/woman, say thank you to others and be slow to speak.

I think we can agree that we all have something we can be thankful for and that we could all use more love, kindness and support in our lives. I am in control of my thoughts and I will not let the negativity seep in. Give yourself a moment and reflect on something you are thankful for today.

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Best Advice for Sticking to a Routine

Many of us try to get into a routine, whether it’s exercising and eating healthy, financial habits, or staying free of clutter. The hardest thing for most people is to stick to it long enough for it to become ingrained. Once you get into the habit of doing something, it’s much easier to keep going – it’s building that habit that’s difficult.

Most of us want to be healthier, workout more, eat whole foods instead of junk foods, be more positive, and so on, but if we’re not motivated to do it, it’s easy to procrastinate until tomorrow becomes a year, or even a decade.

This advice can help make it finally happen now.

Take Advantage of a Life Change

Many ingrained habits are associated with cues from your current schedule and environment. Recently, I had a family member for example, that was faced with a major life change. This life change was buying a new home among the Washington, DC houses for sale. A move can be scary, but it is also, a great time to establish a new routine because many things will be changing anyway. New habits will feel like less of a shock when they’re part of a bigger transition. This is something that has even been proven by science – researchers, led by Dartmouth College Dr. Todd F. Heatherton, found that more than 35 percent of successful changes were linked with moving to a new location.

Focus on What Motivates You

If you can keep your “eye on the prize,” focusing on what motivates you, you can use that for inspiration to keep going, helping to make your new routine an established habit. For example, if you’re trying to eat healthier to eliminate or decrease symptoms of illness, think about how much better you’ll feel. By concentrating on how you’ll feel once you achieve your goals, it can help you stay on track.

Don’t Make it Difficult

If your new routine involves going to the gym four times a week, be sure you have your exercise clothing and other gear packed the day before. If you wait until the last minute and can’t find something you need, it can be easy to give up and forego it altogether. If you’ve been struggling to eat healthy at work, prepare meals ahead of time so they’ll be ready to grab and go. Or maybe your goal is to get into the habit of thoroughly cleaning the house every Saturday morning – be sure you have all the cleaning tools you need before Saturday rolls around. The easier you can make it on yourself, the better. 

Reward Yourself for Accomplishing Smaller Goals

It’s important to set smaller goals on the way to reaching bigger ones so that it doesn’t feel so overwhelming. Define a more progressive set of goals, stepping stones that allow you to build up to your primary goals. You can make this work by giving yourself a reward that will keep you motivated every time you accomplish one. When you don’t, you might donate a preset amount of money to a charity, family member, or friend.

Get support

Share your intentions for a new routine with a friend, or perhaps on social media. If you only have yourself to account for, it’s a lot easier to skip it. If you know someone who wants to develop the same new routine, even better as you can motivate each other. Surrounding yourself with others who encourage better habits is one of the best ways to develop and stick to a new routine.

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Beautifully Flawed

Recovering from trauma is sometimes hard to explain to someone that hasn’t experienced it. The best way I can make it relatable is to say life after trauma is like knowing how to walk, but having to remind yourself multiple times daily that you have to put one foot in front of the other. To remember kindness and to unlearn the reactions to being hurt and to replace the bad memories with good ones is a journey.

I used to think I was broken, flawed and unrepairable. I wanted to rewind time and get back the person I was before anything happened to me. It took a lot of reflecting to understand I would never be the same woman I was before and that it was ok. I learned to embrace the scars both physically and mentally. Then one day something happened and I realized being flawed IS truly beautiful.

Most people have had some sort of trauma in their lives. Some maybe have not experienced abuse,assault or domestic violence, but pain lingers all the same. If you feel that you are flawed because of your experiences know that you are truly beautiful!

Don’t ever let anyone make you feel less of a person because of experiences that were out of your control. People are going to judge you without getting to know your story; it will hurt, but you will survive this too. Being beautifully flawed is being a survivor of your misfortunes and coming out all the more resilient.

Like a diamond which forms under heat and pressure sometimes we become the most beautiful after the trials and tribulations. So, learn to trust again even if you were taken advantage of. Be kind even if you were show the darkest side of evil. Be the light to others and don’t let anything change the person you were meant to be. Make sure the negative doesn’t win. Like a diamond shine after being under pressure. Be proud to show the world how beautifully flawed you are.

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Before the world told you who to be…

When I was a teenager I started competing in beauty pageants for scholarship money. There is always a time during a pageant weekend for rehearsals. During this time contestants practice and most also, see the competition for the first time. A lot of contestants find themselves feeling inadequate in certain ways after seeing the competition. Contestants sometimes start to doubt themselves and their capabilities. These little seeds of doubt caused by comparison cause many contestants to loose their focus and make mistakes that cost them the crown.

For me I’ve competed regionally, nationally and internationally in pageants brining home multiple crowns. I wasn’t always the most beautiful, smartest or talented women on stage, but I beamed confidence. Judges loved my down to Earth attitude and my girl next door look. I knew what only I had to offer and I wasn’t over polished or fake.

Real life isn’t a beauty pageant but, comparing yourself and competing with others can not only make you bitter, but it can also, change you as a person. If you haven’t learned to accept it yet, YOU are unique and have certain gifts and talents that are yours to mold and use. The world doesn’t need a planet full of people that all look and think a like. The world needs you and that little sparkle that makes you special.

Everyone is unique and has different talents and strengths. Figure out what it is that you do best, what you’re passionate about and give it your all. If you need help don’t be afraid to reach out and work with someone that’s trained to help you bring out the best in you. Remember, there are no limits to competing with yourself and the best part is you’ll never lose. As a tip try to only compare yourself to who you were yesterday. Measuring your own success based on the successes of others is only setting yourself up for grief and failure.

Do not distract yourself from your own goals by worrying about the achievements of those around you. Strive to work towards your goals and to only be concerned with your own growth. The sooner you realize that you were born with a unique purpose and to channel all your energy into it the happier you’ll be. Stop comparing yourself to others because the results you are looking for lay only in your own hard work and dedication. If you can’t remember who you were…let me help you figure it out!

What you tell yourself, the inner conversations you have with yourself and what you allow to happen around you is very important. For me it has been very liberating to be able to set boundaries. It may be hard to admit, but whatever you are not changing you are choosing — Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/krystleclear247/support
  1. Words
  2. Beautifully Flawed
  3. You’ll Never Regret Being Kind-Even if it is to Yourself
  4. Setting Boundaries
  5. Sunday Scaries
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A Garden of Love Grows Here…

I am sure you have heard the verse or term, “you reap what you sow”, which basically teaches that people will get back what they are putting out or giving. This is one of my favorite teachings! For me I have always related it to gardening or farming.

When planning a garden good soil, adequate water and sun are all factors that must be considered. These essentially good ingredients must be present for successful seed growth. Like gardening we too can sow seeds (both good and bad) and our decisions, actions and behaviors can result in success or consequences. This is not to say that bad things don’t happen to good people.

If you do not already know it being kind to someone else feels good! Personally, if I have been having an off day myself I have found that by smiling, opening/holding a door, letting someone in front of me or doing a small gesture of kindness for others made my day change for the better. I understand, some people are uncomfortable with giving others complements or talking to strangers and that is OK. It does not take a lot of effort though to kindly smile at another person, open/hold a door for them or let them into traffic. Little gestures of kindness are so important because if each person does their part we can fill the world with love.

Not everyone is going to be receptive of your kindness and that is OK too. Being kind is a choice and you are doing it for yourself. Think of being kind as love in action. What kind of, “seeds”, are you planting? Being kind, showing patience, being loving and inclusive to others all count as planting seeds of good.

What if that one kind remark, smile or gesture prevented another person from being negative towards others, or even on a larger scale prevent them from harming someone or themselves? This is why loving your neighbor, reflecting love and kindness towards everyone, loving yourself and refraining from judgment of others is so important . You never know exactly what another person is going through and how much they may need your kindness. Today can be just one day or it can be day one in your choice to sow kindness!

What you tell yourself, the inner conversations you have with yourself and what you allow to happen around you is very important. For me it has been very liberating to be able to set boundaries. It may be hard to admit, but whatever you are not changing you are choosing — Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/krystleclear247/support
  1. Words
  2. Beautifully Flawed
  3. You’ll Never Regret Being Kind-Even if it is to Yourself
  4. Setting Boundaries
  5. Sunday Scaries
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Flaws, Scars and Imperfections

Flaws make us uniquely us 💕 I have tons of freckles/moles from the sun, my wrinkles and scars on my skin. I wouldn’t change any of it though! Those scars all tell a story…some are a reminder of something I shouldn’t have done and others are a reminder of things I’m glad I did even if I got hurt a little. ⠀

Embrace who you are and don’t worry about what the world tells you to be. There are editing programs that give us a false reality when we look at our favorite celebrities or even some bloggers. I personally don’t want to use an app that makes myself appear thinner or erases part of me. I adjust the brightness and take out the shadows. Things others see as imperfections make me imperfectly me! ⠀

It takes awhile to get comfortable sometimes in your own skin, but it makes life’s journey so much easier 😘 Don’t be afraid to get out there and enjoy things because you’re scared what others will say. Like Michael Jordan said, “ You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”. One day you’ll regret the things you didn’t do.⠀

What you tell yourself, the inner conversations you have with yourself and what you allow to happen around you is very important. For me it has been very liberating to be able to set boundaries. It may be hard to admit, but whatever you are not changing you are choosing — Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/krystleclear247/support
  1. Words
  2. Beautifully Flawed
  3. You’ll Never Regret Being Kind-Even if it is to Yourself
  4. Setting Boundaries
  5. Sunday Scaries